From Blink 182, out of the context of the rest of the lyrics, perfect, in context absolute rubbish. But oh well. I'm sorry it's been so long. So much has changed!! I'm now in second year of university, having managed to pass last year by doing a resit and so made it to the years that matter. I finally got a job and am now an employee of Wetherspoons pubs, I've been there for a few weeks now and I'm loving it. I'm still with Luke of course, we're still going just as strong and there has been a lot of talk of engagement etc. from my friends, my dad and even my mum. We're fast approaching our 5 year anniversary together and I'm so excited about it. I've got some of the best friends I could ask for and the house I am now living in is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. Life's going great!
And yet...
My health is going so badly. I'm finding it so hard to follow my medication routine and it's causing me to become depressed, or that what I think is going on anyway. At the beginning of the new term some things started to go a bit wrong and since then they haven't got much better. I've been struggling to find the time I need to get everything done. But that's not the problem, if it was I'd just be really stressed.
No, I think I'm getting homesick. Me and mum have seen each other once since my birthday. Luke fell asleep on my bed at about 10pm tonight and I got bored so I started watching videos on youtube by this guy called Mike that sings Folk Songs. I've been listening to them and they make me think of my mum, my family, of folk festivals I've been missing and just how much my life has changed and how much I've had to force myself to change to be seen in the right light by people at university. I may be in a beautiful house now, but only really get on with one of my house mates. I moved in with the one flatmate I got on well with last year because I thought I'd have a good idea of what he'd be like to live with, but we've also moved in with his girlfriend and she has caused him to completely change, so things aren't particularly happy in this house. But it means I enjoy work so much more so that's all ok.
I dunno, I guess I just miss the lazy days of summer holidays, the days when I could do what I wanted when I wanted without having to think of time tables and deadlines and things. I think because I've been happy for so long I've sort of run out of the emotion and things that wouldn't have bothered me before have started to become a real problem.
I miss the days when life was easy and you could say what was on your mind without being shot down for it.
